A marriage functions smoothly and cordially when the partners involved respect and perform their roles effectively as they should. A further necessity is that both partners display positive qualities and traits. Accordingly, a consideration of what qualities a good wife should have is what this article aims to discuss. In reality, there are some useful qualities and good wife needs to possess to ensure a working union.
Though some schools of thought may want to dispute some things, however, a good wife needs some qualities that are indispensable if the marriage is to succeed. Truly, just like some people propose, not all women are wives. As such, for one to be qualified as a wife, a good wife at that, then there are requirements in terms of qualities and virtues.
Meanwhile, some of us may not even know who a good wife is and should be. Therefore, I this article, there will be an explanation of who a good wife is and then what qualities a good wife should demonstrate.
Who is a good Wife?
Well, we may not find a dictionary explanation of this but due to prevalent opinions, it is quite safe to give an explanation. A good wife can be seen to be a wife who possesses and displays positive attitudes which are comely and fosters a smooth functioning of the hope which results in a healthy atmosphere and interaction between family members and others.
A good wife is one who is willing and ready to ensure that she adequately plays her roles and fulfills her obligations to the home and her family. There has been so much emphasis on qualities and attributes here. Thus, let us proceed to the next section.
Qualities of A Good Wife
So, what are these qualities that are good woman should have?
1. Proper Expression of Love and Affection
If you have committed to spend a lifetime with a man through nuptials, you must love him. But loving is not enough. A relationship thrives on the expression of that love, among other emotions. So if you love your husband, show him how much he means to you.
You don’t have to make elaborate expressions of love every day. It could just be little gestures such as a kiss or a peck on the cheek now and then, or making his favorite breakfast once in a while or picking a movie he likes to watch together.
Telling that you love him is ok, but wait for the right moment to say it; say it only if it is true.
2. Adequate Communication
In any relationship, communication is critical. And marriage is no exception. Throw away the misconceived notions that a partner is supposed to know what the other one thinks and wants. Your husband cannot read minds, just as you can’t. You may know about each others’ likes and preferences but not necessarily what they are thinking or feeling.
Open communication in the marriage means that you tell your husband what you think or feel and what you expect of him. Talk to your husband – ask, say, and discuss. Avoid the silent treatment, which can make things worse. Don’t leave your husband guessing about what you want. It will be better to clear your mind, try to figure out what you really want while being honest to yourself, and then communicate that to him.
3. Being Supportive and Encouraging
Be it a career, a hobby or anything else that your husband pursues, he’d need and want your support. Being supportive in a marriage is not just about being there when the partner is having a difficult time. It is about appreciating or praising him when he achieves a milestone, or when he overcomes his fear and tries something new.
As a wife, you should be the number one cheerleader of your husband. No matter how difficult the journey into it is, do not discourage your partner from pursuing his dream. You should believe in him—assure him that—and help him in any way you can.
4. Maintaining Friendship and Cordiality
The best marriage is the one where the couple is each other’s best friend. Nothing is better than being in love with your best friend. This is a love that is deep, strong, and genuine. Allow a healthy friendship to develop between you and your husband, and see what difference it makes to your life.
Whether you are a housewife or a working one, you must not make busyness an excuse not to spend time with your husband anymore. To keep love alive even after long years of marriage, couples should not stop dating each other. Both of you should decide to go out together or simply have a hearty talk over cups of coffee at least once a week.
5. Being Interested in his interests
Not everything that your husband likes could interest you. You don’t have to do things that he likes, but give your husband the space to pursue his interests and show some curiosity about what he’s doing. Ask him about the game, book, or hobby that he is interested in.
Do a little homework and learn about the things he is interested in so that you can have a conversation about that too. Having things that both of you enjoy opens the chance for a conversation or an activity that both of you can do together.
6. Being a Good Listener
Listening is critical for effective communication, and perhaps more important than talking. So make a conscious effort not just to hear, but listen and understand when your husband is talking. Pay attention to him during a conversation. Put away your phone, turn off the TV or turn down the music that could be distracting you. Giving your husband your full attention when he is speaking shows how much you respect him.
Listening does not mean you have to agree with him. But even to disagree, you must listen to what he is saying.
7. Being Appreciative
Men, too, have this need to be loved, appreciated, and praised. Tell him how much you appreciate the little things he does for you, for the children, or in the house. Praise encourages him to do more for you, and also sends the message that his efforts are recognized. You don’t have to sing his praises to show appreciation. A simple, genuine ‘thank you’ will suffice
8. Honesty and Sincerity
Honesty is the base for a trusting relationship. Marriages that last are based on honesty and open communication, with no place for cheating or lying. Your husband deserves honesty and truthfulness from you, just as you do from him.
Being honest doesn’t mean you have to say everything. In fact, there are truths that don’t have to be said because all they do is harm. Maybe you don’t like his favorite shirt but it’s not worth saying it. You don’t like his lotion, so buy a different one just saying that you like this one better. Practicing with little things will help you learn how to do it, this practice will help you to know how to say important things, such as those related to sex.
Being truthful won’t always be easy. Sometimes your honesty might upset your husband and may even lead to fights. But dishonesty can damage a relationship so much that the partners will have a tough time trusting each other again. One lie or betrayal and your husband may always have a lingering doubt about your truthfulness.
9. Submission and Respect
No matter how much your personalities, views, and principles differ from each other, you have to respect your husband—like how you would want him to respect you. Yes, you can point out your ideas, but never ever insist that you are right and he is wrong, or call him stupid. Also, never embarrass him in public, particularly in front of your family or his, his friends or yours, and especially in front of your children.
The best marriages are those where the partners respect each other. Your husband is his own individual, with flaws and all. Respect the person he is, not for what he does for you or the family. Mutual respect in the marriage is a must. This reflects in the way you speak and behave with each other.
Do not belittle, humiliate, strike or harm your husband, whether in private or public. A little teasing is alright, but insulting is not okay. So watch what you say and think before you speak.
10. Strong Moral Disposition
Being supportive of your husband does not include tolerating his mistakes. It is also about offering constructive criticism to encourage him to improve in whatever he is doing.
As his wife, it is part of your role to make sure he stays being a good person and citizen, not just for your family and the community, but for himself as well. Rebuke him by talking to him gently about the matter, and help him change or do what is right.
11. High Sense of Forgiveness
Since both of you are imperfect, your marriage should have an allowance for mistakes—there should be grace. If you want to keep your husband, then it means you should be willing to forgive him whenever he commits mistakes and give him a second chance. In addition, the next time you fight, stop bringing back past issues since you have already forgiven him for them.
Loving your husband and accepting who he is involved loving the people he values as well—his family and friends. Therefore, respect his immediate family, especially his parents; ito them; and visit them from time to time. You should also make an effort to get to know his friends better and treat them as your own friends too.
13. Maintaining Good Health and Personal Hygiene
Being a good wife is not limited to putting the needs of your husband first. You know your hubby loves you, so if you would get sick or something bad happens to you, then it would affect him much. For this reason, keep yourself healthy and fit—and this could also help keep your husband in love with you.
14. Being Financially Prudent
The responsibility of proper budgeting and money management must be shared by both husband and wife. For this reason, if you are poor at this, then you have to start learning how to be a better financial manager—this advice goes for your husband as well. This way, you can help save your marriage from a possible breakup due to money problems.
15. Logical Handling of Issues
Marriage is about two different, unique individuals who will have differences. The disagreements and differences can sometimes lead to fights. And those fights, if too many, can strain the relationship. That doesn’t mean you compromise every time. No. Have you ever been nagged by your mom when you were a kid? It was annoying, right? Your husband feels the same every time you nag him about every little thing he does—him leaving his dirty socks lying around, forgetting about picking up deliveries, and so on. Instead of pestering him with sermons, why not talk to him sensibly about your concerns to avoid fights and high blood pressures?
It means you have to think and pick your fights wisely. Ask yourself – ‘Is it worth fighting for?’ What’s stopping you from compromising and let your husband have his way sometimes? If it’s a trivial issue, let it go. Do not let your ego come in the way of a happy, loving relationship with the man you love.
16. Being Lively and Open
Not every day of marriage is exciting. Somewhere along the way, the boredom sets in. You get into a routine and do the same things day in and day out. When ignored, boredom can lead to unhappiness. So what do you do?
Have fun and do not let boredom creep into your relationship. Go on dates, picnics, road trips and tours. Or plan movie nights, cook dinner together, watch a TV series, be silly together, take yoga or dance classes together, learn a language together and do something that will help you two get out of your comfort zones.
17. Being Romantic and Affectionate
Marriages that lack romance tend to fizzle out sooner or later. So step up your romance by a notch or two and get back to the basics. Get flirtatious, tease him, touch him lovingly, kiss him spontaneously and lead him in the bedroom. Taking the first step in romance or lovemaking does not mean you are needy and it will not make you any less than the man. So if you’re in the mood for something romantic, go ahead and do it. Surprise him!
18. Being Attentive to Physical Intimacy
One thing that all men want to know is that they are good in bed. They need to hear it often, to boost their confidence and make them feel like ‘da man’. That said, most men may not be comfortable asking what they want in bed. But in a marriage, you should be able to talk about your wildest fantasies and try them out.
So, don’t worry about getting creative and trying something new with your husband. It could be something that you like, or he likes. If you know your husband and you know that he likes to experiment with new things you propose, don’t hesitate to tell him about what you want to try; but you have to be careful if your husband is insecure.
Therefore, in as much as most marriage failures can be traced to defects on the part of partners, wives, as well as husbands, have their own individual errors and weaknesses. On this background, it is pertinent that we highlight those qualities a good wife needs to have to support her husband. These traits do not have to be a hundred percent, an average possession of them is a good start.
Needless to say that anyone wife who finds herself lacking in any of these traits should do well to develop herself and strive to become better. Also, husbands need to be accommodating and willing to endure their wives while passing through this period of transition and acquiring these traits if they were initially deficient. All parties must remember that no one is a perfect being.
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