A Yummy and Edible List of Vegetable Puns 2021 Update.
Are you in the market for a funny vegetable pun? You can’t “beet” the collection of clever veggie puns and jokes below.
Be it root veggies or leafy greens, there might be a time when you’re in need of a corny vegetable puns. It could be for a text message, an Instagram caption, a pick-up line, or just when you need a laugh.
To get you started on your vegetable jokes, “peas” check out the collection below.
Vegetable Puns Collections
Is there a turnip ahead?
Turnip down for what?
Time to turnip the page
Don’t be such a dead beet
You make my heart beet
Just beet it
Let’s get down to this sick beet
Haha, you kale me
Kale me baby?
Don’t kale my vibe
Oh, kale yeah
I hope for world peas
Peas be mine
I need some peas and quiet
Hungry? Let me brussel up some dinner
Every day I’m brusselin’
Brussel and Heart will set you apart
Everybody romaine calm
This foundation is rock salad
Lettuce be thankful
Lettuce Romaine Friends
You look radish-ing
You are so rad-dish
He ra-dishes it out but he can’t take it
What did mother potato say to her teenage daughter?
Don’t roll your eyes at me!
I’ll stop gardening when kale freezes over
What did the last tomato on the vine say when all his friends got picked?
I’ll ketchup with you guys later!
What’s a grammar teacher’s favorite herb?
What’s the reddest vegetable you can get?
Bring me a legume, and make it snap pea!
How did the broccoli feel about being served for dinner?
It was steamed!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because he saw the salad dressing!
What did the bok choy say when it was harvested?
I’ll be bok!
What do you call veggies that have been arrested by the police?
How do you mend a broken tomato?
With tomato paste!
How do you fix a broken head of cabbage?
With a cabbage patch!
What’s the best vegetable to feed to a captive animal?
You look absolutely radishing.
Did you hear about the guy who got arrested for vegetable theft?
He took a leek in the garden!
How did the fungus find a place to grow?
Oh, it doesn’t need mushroom!
Is a jalapeño hot?
No, it’s actually a little chili!
Did you hear about the little bean who looked just like his dad?
Like fava, like son!
A good gardener doesn’t miss a beet.
Where do all the veggies go to get their drink on?
The salad bar!
What do you get from eating iceberg lettuce and snow peas?
Your recommended daily amount of fi-brr!
Excuse me, where can I find the caesar salads?
In the caesarian section!
Who’s in charge of salads around here, anyway?
That would be the head of lettuce!
You be my sweet potato, and I’ll be your spud muffin.
What kind of vegetable can you grow in your basement?
I love you from my head tomatoes.
Could you help me find my missing root vegetables?
Sorry, but I don’t carrot all about that. I’m sure they’ll turnip somewhere.
A mushroom might be a fungi, but he’s not as cool as a cucumber.
What did the weirdo say after he was caught creeping around in someone’s garden?
I’ve bean stalking you!
What type of vegetables have trouble speaking up for themselves?
Are you growing sweet potatoes this year?
Yes, I yam!
You say you make a great caesar salad, but that romaines to be seen.
Why is it easy to make puns about onions?
Because they’re so pun-gent!